“*WHIRLS SNAPE OUT OF THE WAY*
*SHOVES MINERVA INTO A WALL*
PUT YOUR NAME
*KNOCKS OVER A TABLE AGGRESSIVELY*
IN THE GOBLET
*GRABS HARRY AND SLAMS HIM INTO THE WALL*
OF FIRE!?!?!?1111?!?!111321I3591130583FERGEKLJRKGJ GRLGJWRLKGVJLKJ G” Dumbledore asked calmly.
we’re never gonna get over this are we
"i want a blowjob"
quiero una biblia
"call a prostitute"
llama a la monja
"where is the strip club"
donde esta la iglesia
"i want to get laid"
quiero leer la palabra de dios
"You’re looking at a straight shooter, America. I tell it like it is, I calls ‘em like I sees them. I will speak to you in plain, simple English. And that brings us to tonight’s Word. Truthiness. Now I’m sure some of the word police - the word-onistas - over at Websters are gonna say, ‘Hey, that’s not a word.’ Well, anybody who knows me know that I’m no fan of dictionaries or reference books. They’re elitist. Constantly telling us what is or isn’t true, or what did or didn’t happen. Who’s Britannica to tell me the Panama Canal was finished in 1914? If I wanna say it happened in 1941 that’s my right. I don’t trust books. They’re all fact, no heart. And that’s exactly what’s pulling our country apart today. ‘Cause face it, folks, we are a divided nation. Not between Democrats and Republicans, or conservatives and liberals, or tops and bottoms, no. We are divided between those who think with their head, and those who know with their heart. Consider Harriet Miers. If you think about Harriet Miers, of course her nomination’s absurd. But the President didn’t say he thought about his selection. He said this. ["I know her heart."] Notice how he said nothing about her brain. He didn’t have to. He feels the truth about Harriet Miers. And what about Iraq? If you think about it, maybe there are a few missing pieces to the rationale for war. But doesn’t taking Saddam out feel like the right thing? Right here? Right here in the gut? Because that’s where the truth comes from, ladies and gentleman. The gut. Do you know you have more nerve endings in your stomach than in your head? Look it up. Now, somebody’s gonna say, ‘I did look that up, and it’s wrong.’ Well, mister, that’s because you looked it up in a book. Next time, try looking it up in your gut. I did. And my gut tells me that’s how our nervous system works. Now I know some of you may not trust your gut, yet, but with my help you will. The truthiness is, anyone can read the news to you. I promise to feel the news, at you."
- The Colbert Report, 9 years ago today, creating a classic moment during their first show ever
well he really should have worn more protective clothing if he didn’t want that to happen
sounds to me like he was asking for it
Are we really sure he was actually shot and decapitated? Idk, sounds like something he would’ve made up. Guys make false decapitation accusations all the time, you know.
If he didn’t want to be decapitated, he shouldn’t have worn a shirt that showed off his neck
I mean, not all woman decapitate people. I’m not like that.